Casual Monday -- More Acheivement Points Edition

Zombies, pirates, ninjas...do these things really get old? Though pirates and ninjas have a base in humanity's past, zombies stand out amongst these giants as they are clearly not a part of our past, but our future. Oh yeah, the zombie apocalypse is coming, you didn't know? It's good to have a plan. (And seriously, don't forget to bring a towel, seriously.)

A good way to practice for the upcoming slaughter, the alpha AND the omega, is to shoot the hell out of an endless stream of our new overlords mindless zombies -- and Sean T. Cooper wants to facilitate that. His development studio, Boxhead, focuses specifically on zombie related games, and for our Casual Monday purposes, he has created Boxhead: The Zombie Wars, available on his site as well as our new favorite site, Kongregate.com.

QP suggests playing it on Kongregate, and even furthermore, signing up for an account with them (yes, it's free.) Not only is there game tracking but also achievements for every game (god help us all) and chat rooms. It's all quite well integrated and stands as a great example of where the videogame industry is headed. Browser based digital life folks!

Anyways, Mr. Cooper started developing games way back in 1987 for Electronic Arts, "and they collectively sold 20 million copies plus." Now he just makes flash games for the hell of it. Sounds pretty ok to us, especially given the high level of quality inherent in Boxhead's games. We suggest perusing their website as well as Kongregate, though you may beat us to the punch in future editions of Casual Monday. On second thought, relax, let us sort through those games for you. You deserve a break. Seeya next Monday folks.

Double Vision? (or) Michael Pachter Confuses the Shit Out of Me

Grand Theft Auto IV is less than a month away at this point and (especially after just finishing Crackdown) all of us here at QPHQ are psyched as, well, as everyone else we suppose. The battle is heating up over where the game is going to end up; Halo 3 and Call of Duty 4 were the last two games with similar selling power to be released, the latter of which being one-console exclusive. Grand Theft Auto has always been associated with the Playstation brand, though all previous versions have ended up on Xbox as well as the PC, selling considerably less and finding their way to retail shelves months later. However, this time Microsoft has secured exclusive downloadable content for the newest installment in the franchise as well as pushing marketing strong like bear.

Honestly, in our opinion, things could go either way. We're betting on two-to-one sales or more on the Microsoft side of things, but that's just our humble opinion (having been gaming retailers ourselves on more than one occasion.) Michael Pachter, of Wedbush Morgan Securities, of the analyst breed, has offered his opinion on the subject in more than one instance -- unfortunately his responses somewhat disagree with each other. In the most recent episode of Bonus Round, the GameTrailers.com show hosted by Geoff Keighley (yes, that Geoff Keighley, our hero) Pachter was quoted as saying, regarding which console may bring home the most bacon:

"Perversely, I think it's still coming out for PS3 primarily. And I know there are more 360s out there but....much like Halo has been branded as an Xbox game and now an Xbox 360 game, people who own a 360, who own an Xbox consider it their game. GTA has always been a PS2 game. I think there's a large number of PS2 owners who've been waiting to buy their PS3 until this game comes out. So I think you're gonna see a big spike in PS3 sales."

Keighley, putting Pachter on the spot, asks, "What do you predict for the April sales for PS3 and 360?" Pachter's response was, "Xbox 360 sales will be 350(thousand) and PS3 sales will be 500(thousand). I think it'll be that kind of a difference."

Oddly though, Pachter is claiming quite the opposite to Take-Two, GTAIV's developer, in a recent research report, stating "he expects the company to sell nine million units within the first year of its release, six million of which will be on Xbox." Anyone else confused? We're not exactly high payed economics analysts, but this don't make no sense. Ideas?

Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII Thoughts

Final Fantasy VII has remained one of my absolute favorite games for many many years, though until now I've avoided the whole "compilation of Final Fantasy VII" crap except Advent Children (which was really just an excuse to see all the people and places in pretty graphics). But, after hearing all the chit chat about how Crisis Core actually didn't suck, I bought into it and, having just finished it, I must say that not only did it not suck, it was actually really pretty damn good.

Being the FFVII fangirl that I am, I was positively gleeful to be able to visit areas and meet people from Final Fantasy VII. Most of the areas were pretty faithful to the original game, which made for some nice nostalgic exploration.

I'd have to say that now, Zack is my favorite lead character from any FF I've played. Cloud was an asshole, Squall was an emo asshole, Zidane was fucking annoying, Tidus looked like Meg Ryan and Vaan needed to take his Ritalin. But Zack, Zack's a cool guy, which makes his tragic end all the more depressing.

The end...ah, the end. Players of FFVII already know how Crisis Core will end, but the way it ends was rather satisfying and pretty intense. It also brought a tear to my eye! A game hasn't made me cry in a while, so hats off to Squeenix for jerking my tears.

One beef that I have with all this compilation of FFVII stuff: Her name is Aeris. Remember that game, Final Fantasy VII? The game all these other games and movies and OVAs are based off of? Yeah. In that, it's Aeris. I don't give a shit what it is in the Japanese version. In the English version, it's Aeris, so keep it that way, don't change it to Aerith in everything else. It was bearable in Kingdom Hearts, because she wasn't a major character, and it was an alternate universe anyway. But this is the goddamn prequel to FFVII, she should have the same name. Aeris is prettier than Aerith, anyway.

Holy Crap, 50 Cent Lives in Connecticut!

Regardless of the fact that now every time I visit my parents' house I have to watch my back for 'fitty', MTV.com has an hilarious piece up (by none other than Stephen Totilo of legitimate MTV blog 'Multiplayer', the poor bastard) wherein said interviewer is subjected to pulling literary blood from the stone that is 50 Cent's brain, which is located in fitty's head, in his Farmingdale, Ct. home. As someone from Connecticut and someone who's been to Farmingdale, the enormity of how funny 50 Cent walking around that town is may be lost on some of you. Trust us, it's pretty goddamn funny.

Whether or not you understand that level of comedy is one thing; fitty's new game "50 Cent: Blood on the Sand" (a sequel, mind you, to 2005's Bulletproof -- a million plus seller with lower than a 50% average on metacritic...), however, will assuredly leave you rotflmao all night long. Fitty himself, speaking about his input on the game, had this to say:

"I enjoyed 'Blood Diamond,' and I wanted to take some of that concept and move it into the video game front."

Right! Blood Diamond! Totally! Look, we get it, he's a mogul, right? He's not supposed to be the creative brains behind his very very very silly upcoming videogame, he's just supposed to look pretty and spit hot fire every now and then. Still, even though this game is being developed with Unreal Engine 3, we expect slim to none in terms of actual gameplay. As a person who has seen first hand the urban community's reaction to 50 Cent: Bulletproof (at least in Philadelphia), I can handily say these folks publishing Blood on the Sand should worry about their investment a little more this time -- the public may know better by now.

Oh, and we totally stick by Joystiq with this one (no pun intended) and we're also covering as much news about this mess as it unfolds. To see the original interviews as well as the original article (that may or may not be held together by hope and dreams), follow me there.

Kinky Gamers, Take Note

Holy. Crap. We don't know any ladies daring enough to sport this outfit (well, maybe a couple), but we're not exactly sure if we want to see that. Actually, we're sure that we do not want to see that; something about a mute child, dressed in a green tunic, holding a piece of triforce between a woman's breasts is...deeply unsettling. Anyways, Etsy user TheVintageDoctor makes her deeply unsettling wonderful creations out of strong materials that she promises will stand the test of time, or in this case, sexual escapades:

"All knit fabrics are pieced together with wooly nylon - not regular quilting thread. This means that the seams actually expand along with the garment and snap back to their orginal shape - normal thread has no stretch whatsoever and unravels very very easily on knits."

We'll take your word on that one, Doctor. One thing we do know for sure -- she has a large zebra print backdrop just laying around. Those interested in the item to the left need go no further than this shop here. You'll find something more bizarre than the LoZ corset...like an Alvin & the Chipmunks one. Yup. Stir that one around your noggin'.

Week-End Podcast Roundup -- A Day Late, A Dollar Short Edition

And yes, it's Saturday. Officially the weekend but also roughly one day late on the podcast roundup train schedule. Sorry about that folks, things were a little hectic around QPHQ yesterday and thus the unexpected delay. Regardless of our tardiness, we come bearing promises of games reviews very shortly (No More Heroes and The Legend of the Zelda: Phantom Hourglass to name a few) as well as a full on site revamp in the coming days. Though a few new features will be added, the biggest update will be basic functionality. But enough about us, we're here to tell you about this week in podcasting, so let's get to it...

The GiantBombcast (feat. Jeff Gerstmann and Ryan Davis)
Joystiq Podcast (feat. Chris Grant, Ludwig Kietzmann and Justic McElroy)
The CAGcast (feat Cheapy D and Wombat)
The 1UP Show and 1UP Yours Podcast (feat. Garnett Lee, Shane Bettenhausen, ???, and Shawn Elliott)

The 1UP Show was especially good this week, just so you know, with a hilarious Lost Odyssey shoutout near the end -- that's all we're sayin'. In 1UP related news, we were cruising the most popular gaming stories on News4Gamers and stumbled upon this. Now, first of all, we know that NeoGAF is, "the preeminent video game industry discussion community." That's fantastic, and by those standards (I suppose?), they don't moderate when people post info straight out of print magazines (though they really should.) This seems kind of...embarrassing? Ridiculous? Fucking rude? This is the magazine journalism equivalent of going to a movie line and reading the script out loud. What a bunch of louts.

Anyways, the boys at the 'Stiq have clearly caught their stride, as their podcast has become better and better. Also, Vinnie Caravella and Brian Ekberg are jointly saving GameSpot's ailing Hotspot podcast, as the vast majority of talent at GameSpot has left for better other things, or, ya know, been sacked. Enjoy your weekend, we'll seeya Monday!

Portal Lovefest Continues, When Will it Stop?

Gamasutra is an interesting website that we don't acknowledge enough, as gamers, for their contributions. They employ exactly the kind of journalism we need more of in this industry, delving deeper into your favorite (and not so favorite) videogames and engaging the developers for insight after the game ships. For instance, this piece by Brandon Sheffield where he interviews Kim Swift and Erik Wolpaw of Valve Studios fame about their groundbreaking work, Portal.

Speaking frankly and interestingly about the development of Portal itself, as well as the minutiae of design at Valve (here's a hint, it involves a lot of gameplay testing), Kim and Erik touch on lots of interesting subjects -- especially given we may have actually listened to the developer commentary that comes with Portal...

Either way, some standout stuff from the interview (in our humble opinions) is the short dialog about a DS version of Portal (not coming anytime soon) and the (thousandth) confirmation that there is certainly more Portal coming. Also, and this is roughly the fifteenth time we've seen this or so, Mr. Sheffield asks Kim and Erik if GlaDoS is alive or dead. The song is called "Still Alive" people! Anyways, we promise, less Portal news. Seriously.

"Why People Don't Finish Games Anymore"

1UP.com has a neat little feature up about why gamers tend to abandon games before they finish them. As a long-time sufferer of what I refer to as "gamer's ADD", I can relate to the article completely, especially this little bit:

"In other words, compared to the '80s, not as many gamers need to scrounge up pocket money or beg Grandma for pennies to buy the latest hit. Games have moved beyond a once-a-year treat at Christmas or birthdays that are subsequently picked apart and scoured for every second of available fun. Now, once a game loses the slightest bit of momentum, it's not difficult for gamers to find themselves lured away by another title."

Back in the SNES days, I had very few games, and I played through all of them obsessively. I have a game file on my Donkey Kong Country cartridge that has more hours logged into it than any RPG I own. Now, games have less of a novelty factor, and we feel less compelled to scour a game for every last little thing (how many people actually wandered around and got all those goddamn flags in Assassin's Creed?)

However, as of late I've been getting better about beating games. I've beaten all of my 360 games, and all but two of my Wii games. DS and PSP games are much harder for me to pay attention to, for reasons I cannot identify. I'll beat New Super Mario Bros....eventually...

Master Chief Mod for Unreal Tournament Elicits Hilarity

Oh Microsoft, you so crazy! Allowing your lawyer to talk all that smack on his blog about your direct rival? Not what we'd call "tactful", but hilarious none the less. Microsoft lawyer (and serious smack-talker) Don McGowan, writing on his blog in response to the Business Week post regarding the use of a Master Chief mod in Unreal Tournament (on the PS3), had this to say:

"Actually it's nothing more than the Game Content Usage Rules in action. When these were developed, people all thought they were focused on machinima. The truth is that while they do address machinima they also allow for a lot of other things. Mods like this are one of them. The developers aren't selling the mod, they're not monetizing Microsoft's IP, they're just creating something to share their love of the Master Chief on a new platform. It's a great thing for us and a great thing for the gaming community. And much though I love my friends at Epic, Unreal Tournament isn't Halo. This will also remind people of just how great the Halo games are and remind them that if they're done with the user-created faux-Halo experience, the real Halo is available only on the Xbox 360. And no one is taking characters from PlayStation games (do they even have any games?) and putting them on our platform..."

Now we know this is a "playful stab" at their competitor but we can't help but point out it smacks a bit of arrogance and (especially given the internet-savvy profile of the gaming community) doesn't help to bolster Microsoft's "street cred" with the gaming pubic at large. While many commenters on his blog immediately pointed out that Microsoft's platform is so locked down that it wouldn't allow for this kind of user generated content, and thus why you haven't seen mods like this showing up in Xbox 360 games, we'd like to calmly point out Rock Band's character creation (though limited, we understand) as well as the fact that you can import YOUR FACE into Rainbow Six: Vegas (1 + 2, no?) Importing Kratos it is not, but the system isn't exactly hermetically sealed.

To be perfectly honest, though he clearly didn't need to post his two cents about Sony's game lineup, we prefer when these types actually say something that isn't straight up PR speak such as this. One commenter on his blog entry even went as far as to call him a fanboy -- he works for Microsoft, people! ::collective sigh:: Oh the internet...

Grand Theft Auto IV PS3 Map Leaks, Raises New Questions

Of course it leaked. I mean, come on -- seriously. With less than a month and a half to go before it's release, Grand Theft Auto IV has been kept fairly well under wraps by developer Rockstar Games. Luckily for us, someone got antsy and felt as though they just had to go out and take detailed pictures of the map that may very well be shipping with the PS3 version of GTAIV.

These images are, as this often goes, still tentative as far as being the final product. Until you have the final box in your hands (which this map could very well have been from), you won't know for sure. Either way, based on the momentary grazing we gave it, we're inclined to trust it's validity (though trepidaciously.) To be frank, there's a hell of a lot of good games out right now and GTAIV is still a month off. Enjoy the time you have now to play those other games. This map is sweet and we surely looked through it, but hyping a game that will almost certainly deliver seems a bit like beating a dead horse, if you ask us. But that's only if you ask us.

Also, Rock Band was on sale at Amazon.com for $150 for PS3 and Xbox 360. The drums are still on sale for $54 and $68 (for Xbox 360 and PS3 respectively.) Just letting you know is all!

Microsoft: 1; Cheaters: 0

Microsoft's Larry Hryb, aka Major Nelson, posted the other day about the recent action taken against achievement whores who took their uncanny obsession just a bit too far. Dirty cheaters are now to be shamed most publicly on Xbox Live, and will also have their gamerscores reset to zero. Turns out that honesty is, indeed, the best policy.

Dead Fantasy II -- A Monty Oum of Quality

This is not for anyone in particular, it's for people who like things that are awesome, and only them. If you're smart you'll watch the whole thing from end to end, most likely forgetting to inhale while witnessing ridiculous fight scenes. From the creator of Haloid before it (as well as Dead Fantasy I), Monty Oum again brings incredible editing to a mashup battle of characters from separate videogame universes. As with DFI, he again pairs the flying, shooting, gunblade-pointing femme fatales of the Final Fantasy world with the massive-breast-wielding females of Dead or Alive fame.

Lots of your favorites appear here, with a promise in the future that, " You seriously have not seen anything yet." Oh dip! That's good to read, 'cause honestly, we were impressed as hell with Haloid alone. The fact that these are free makes them all the more impressive, from this blogger's humble perspective. Enjoy!

Casual Monday -- Dinosaurs With Feathers Edition

Holy crap! It's past noon! Normally we like to have our Casual Monday section up and running early in the a.m., for your gaming pleasure. This week, however, we got caught up playing this game so much that we didn't even realize the time. I guess it's true what they say, "Time flies when you're driving over dead velociraptors." Oh well. As you may have inferred from our oh-so-clever title, this week's Casual Monday comes to you from Flashbang Studios, and is titled Off-Road Velociraptor Safari. Seriously, that's really the name. Amazing, isn't it?

The premise? You drive a Jeep Wrangler looking 4x4 over the scattered herds of velociraptors, sometimes deploying your medieval spiked mace to finish the job. There are achievements, points for just about everything and lots of good fun to be had. The driving mechanic isn't perfect but it's pretty frackin' good for a web-based, 3-dimensional, velociraptor murder sim.

Flashbang Studios have lovingly stated their intentions in creating this game on their website:
"Off-Road Velociraptor Safari was created in eight weeks. We made the game because we wanted to play it. Enjoy!"

There's a bit of a thinly veiled story regarding the velociraptors dead bodies and why you're bringing their carcasses to teleporters (they're being transported to the future where there's less meat -- obviously.) The company you work for has littered the ancient terrain with boxes of supplies, teleporters and conveniently placed jumps, which is mighty nice of them, don't you think?

Seriously though, did you really need a story for this? This is gold. Why aren't you playing right now?

Mainstream Assimilation -- The 2008 New York Auto Show

Though strange and possibly hard to believe, the auto industry and the videogame industry in America are tied together in a variety of ways -- whether it be Pontiac paying homage to Spyhunter with their newest commercial (as seen above), Dodge hosting Wii Sports and Guitar Hero 3 kiosks on the edge of their 2008 New York Auto Show floor displays or Lexus sponsoring a massive Gran Turismo 5: Prologue area for showgoers to check out (all seen below), this year's New York Auto Show was intricately permeated with nods to the videogame industry it has repeatedly collaborated with. We scoured the floor and were there to play GT5:Prologue (in stupid automatic only, unfortunately.) It's quite possible there was a brand new Nissan Skyline GTR, also...

As you see above, one excited security guard was left to insure no one tried making off with these huge metal contraptions that housed GT5:Prologue -- foiled again! These wonderful looking machines came equipped with a go and stop pedal as well as a non-force feedback wheel. This should be read as, "These machines were excellent at showing GT5: Prologue and nothing else." We here at QP appreciate the fact that these machines were open to the public and thus need as few barriers to entry as possible, however, it's goddamn Gran Turismo. The game is meant for racing/car enthusiasts and is damn near worthless to play in automatic, none the less with no force feedback. We digress...

That's right. Pictured above is certainly Guitar Hero 3, surrounded by a line all day. Though tempting, we didn't bother melting the faces of all within the Jakob K. Javits convention center with our ridiculous shredding abilities. We can't stress enough how intelligent it was of Dodge to sponsor this kiosk on the edge of their event, especially given the amount of children nipping at the ankles of their enraptured parents.

We spotted this bad guy wondering around the Mercedes-Benz show floor, throwing out koopas and kidnapping squeaky-voiced strawberry blond ladies...errr...looking at a classic Merc -- fiiiiiine. Though you'd think a Bowser sighting would be the scariest encounter one could have here, you'd be mistaken...

Unfortunately, there was no removable gatling gun, but this complete ripoff concept Hummer is "modeled after" the legendary, multiple Halo-traversing, Warthog. The Hummer floor rep noted this model is most likely not headed for production, though it was hard to hear him given how completely full of shit his mouth was. Yeah, we don't like Hummer or PR reps (and no, we refuse to make the obvious joke.) Below is one more shot of the Hummer concept, provided for your viewing pleasure -- though if you're really looking for something amazing (and completely non-videogame related, sorry), scroll down a bit further to see a little sample of the (finally in America) Nissan Skyline GTR.

(No joke)

Week-End Podcast Roundup -- On the Road Edition

If we're bringing you this week's podcast roundup, that means it's Friday and you're about to head directly into the week's end. As Mr. Garnett Lee says, "Weekend Confirmed!" We're all running around like crazy at QPHQ, frantically spring cleaning and trying desperately to complete Crackdown (and maybe even enjoy some Call of Duty 4 multiplayer) before GTA4 releases on April 29th. Do you ever get the feeling that you're hyping up a game too much and that doing so will sour the experience when it does finally release? That happened to me a bit with Halo 3, finding myself not even having finished the Legendary campaign months after it's release. Shocking, considering I've read all the books and the graphic novel (maybe I shouldn't announce that on the internet.) Anyways, here's this week's podcast roundup, starting with newcomer Giant Bomb's "GiantBombcast", and finishing up with the ever dependable 1UP Show and 1UP Yours Podcast.

The GiantBombcast (feat. Jeff Gerstmann and Ryan Davis)
Joystiq Podcast (feat. Chris Grant, Ludwig Kietzmann and Justic McElroy)
The CAGcast (feat Cheapy D and Wombat)
The 1UP Show and 1UP Yours Podcast (feat. Garnett Lee, Shane Bettenhausen, ???, and Shawn Elliott)

Though I usually take a long, warm bath, put on my smoking jacket, relax in the Barcalounger
and start a fire, for roughly four hours of podcast listening, this week it'll be nothing but my iPod and the Northeast Corridor of Amtrak. We'll see you later this weekend! (maybe...)

As If LEGO Alone Isn't Amazing Enough, Here's LEGO AND Portal -- Combined!

The intrepid bloggers at Joystiq (in the middle of the night none the less) dug up this incredible stop-motion LEGO video based around Portal and it's omnipresent final song "Still Alive." Now, we understand, we've said a lot about the game some consider GOTY, but we can't help it -- it's an addiction. Doesn't it make you ridiculously happy to hear GlaDoS get down about coming out of beta and releasing on time?

Regardless, Nick Larsen Media, the one man show of media production that is Nick Larsen, needs to be hired by someone, and quick. Videos like this not only show creativity and intelligence but also superb editing skills and incredible patience. We applaud you, sir. Your work was an excellent way to start the morning, and for that, we can't help but appreciate it. Check the video here if you didn't already follow the bump up top.

One Video Will Make You Sick, One Video Will Make You Laugh -- Will You Choose Wisely?

Guitar Hero: On Tour is something we've known about for some time. Repeated "leaks" (intentional or not) as well as straightforward answers have answered most of the very few questions people had regarding this game. Are you excited to bring a guitar peripheral with you for your DS? Yeah, thought so. Anyways, though we're not the biggest fans of Fox owned IGN (and not because it's Fox owned, but because it's a hack videogame website), they got that exclusive on the GH:OT reveal and we must give credit where credit is due (though we suggest you surf away from IGN quickly afterwards, as though a panther were chasing you.)

In case you'd rather not explore the horrible promotional video yourself, here's a breakdown: There's two middle-class, teenage white kids. They plug in a bunch of real band equipment (read as: cabinets, heads, generic amp switch-flipping), open their real electric guitar cases, only to find a DS Lite and a tiny little Guitar Hero themed peripheral -- this is where things get really crazy. They realize that their only possible option is also the most obvious one: they must look as silly as possible trying their best to play Guitar Hero (with only four fret buttons, mind you), rocking as hard as they have to (with a DS and a little fret board with, again, only four buttons, that plugs into their DS' GBA slot.

All in all, I'd say you shouldn't watch it, though in fairness, you do see actual gameplay (which looks about as ridiculous as you're imagining right now -- maybe more.) If you're one of those folks out there getting psyched for this, well, you're nuts. But that's ok, because so are we, though we don't share in your excitement. There are many ways to be nuts -- jeez. Now, if you've endured the video above, you should bask in the bedlam and additionally watch the completely NSFW and totally not videogame related video below. And remember, "RESPECTA LA DONA!" Oh my!

Oops! Playstation Europe Accidentally Drops Some Knowledge

Oh noooes! Big mistakes from Sony, and not just in any language, but in SPANISH! Well, only sort of actually. In this humble writer's opinion, the biggest deal on here is the firm Home release date, though I'm sure some of you out there may disagree, and you can all go straight to hell. Either way, Sony has, shockingly, released a press statement regarding this entire list...and it kind of makes a lot of sense what they have to say:

"Internal working documents naturally have proposed dates against titles, but these change frequently and dates are not confirmed until issued as part of a press release or formal announcement. The same applies to titles of games, which may be working titles or placeholders subject to later confirmation."

And furthermore...

"As a result, no weight should be given to titles or dates that appear in this document, other than to those which have already been formally confirmed. We will not be commenting on any title mentioned that has not already been confirmed and/or given an official launch date."

In so many words, yeah this list leaked was totally super serial, but as with most projected release lists (none the less internal ones), all subject matter is subject to change.

Casual Monday -- Feed the World Edition

Another week has begun, tired though we are, and as you should expect by this point, we're here to offer you another free casual game for your entertainment pleasure. Our selection this week comes inspired by our Week End Podcast Roundup, directly from our sordid weekend of podcast listening and museum visiting (also that damned GTA4 piece in EGM has forced us into a solid week of obsessive Crackdown revisiting.)

Regardless! This week's game is of the text based type and it's called, "Free Rice." The concept is simple: you are given a word and you must match it with it's synonym, which is one of the four answers offered. It's a never-ending, multiple-choice, vocabulary test. But there's a catch! For every answer you get correct, www.freerice.com will donate 20 grains of rice to the UN World Food Program (a program that feeds people in some of the poorest parts of the world.) All in all, this is a good deal. Even furthermore, while you're answering questions correctly, there's a cartoon bowl of rice on the right side of the page filling up with your donations -- it's hard to deny the attraction of feeding folks who need food by playing a free game.

Is the game going to change your life? Probably not, but it may change someone elses -- and that's no joke. The totals they've achieved since launch are pretty impressive as far as changing the world goes -- they also inspire you to play this game, should you think your contribution isn't going to help that much. Now go help some people, and learn some SAT words ...in toto. Yeah, I said it.

Faux Vintage Ads: Makes Mouths Happy

39 entries to this amazing Worth1000.com contest are posted so far, nearly all of them stupendous. That most likely has to do with one of this contests caveats, "As always, quality is a must. We will remove poor entries no matter how much we like you." Harsh but fair, like a calm elephant -- right...

Standouts in the group for us were clearly the Wii Remote example posted right at the top of the first page, as well as the Playstation 3 ad. Good stuff. When you folks out there get a hold of Photoshop, some wonderful things happen from time to time. Us here at QPHQ are going to the museum and enjoying the rest of the weekend -- we'll seeya later...maybe...

(Enjoy the image, Katie?)

Week-End Podcast Roundup -- Out of O.J. Edition

The weekend is nearly here and that means two things here at QPHQ: no more orange juice and lots of podcasts. Though we're all quite sad about the lack of o.j. around these parts, the plethora of videogame listening goodness podcastiness bestowed upon us weekly helps to quell the "werewolf rage" building inside of me. Thirst for citrus drink rising...

(Making it's debut this week, from Jeff Gerstmann and Ryan Davis [of GameSpot fame]):
The GiantBombcast (feat. Jeff Gerstmann and Ryan Davis)
Joystiq Podcast (feat. Chris Grant, Ludwig Kietzmann and Justic McElroy)
The CAGcast (feat Cheapy D and Wombat)
The 1UP Show and 1UP Yours Podcast (feat. Garnett Lee, Shane Bettenhausen, ???, and Shawn Elliott)

The guys over at GiantBomb have yet to establish a real schedule for weekly releases of their podcast, though they certainly come out once a week, often earlier than later. If you're like us, you'll just set up all these on your iTunes and enjoy them when they come through -- no skin off our backs. Now have a good weekend, all you folks out there in the middle of these huge, crazy tubes. We'll see you bright and early Monday morning with a casual piece of enjoyment that will also benefit some folks who aren't as lucky as you or I. For now, good night, and good luck. (OH! We almost forgot! Send us orange juice! Not from concentrate please, thanks.)

Hostile Takeover! EA Pushes Take-Two -- Hard

We woke up this morning expecting puppy dogs and rainbows, not news of a hostile takeover! The internet has collectively exploded with news surrounding the recent announcement by Electronic Arts of their plans for a now hostile takeover of Take-Two Interactive Games, parent company of Grand Theft Auto developer, Rockstar Games. In fact, EA specifically notes Rockstar as their target in this acquisition:

"[Rockstar and its franchise Grand Theft Auto is the] primary interest of EA's attempted purchase of Take Two games.", said chief executive John Riccitiello.

"I believe the company is fully justified in calling themselves 'Rockstar' because that's what they are in this industry.", added Riccitiello.

In an effort to handle the situation, Take-Two has asked it's investors to, "take no action at this time in response to the announcement by Electronic Arts Inc. that it has made an unsolicited conditional tender offer to acquire all of Take-Two's outstanding shares of common stock for $26 per share in cash.

Consistent with its fiduciary duties, and in consultation with its independent financial and legal advisors, Take-Two's Board will review and consider EA's offer, and within 10 business days, will advise Take-Two's stockholders of the Board's position regarding the offer as well as its reasons for that position."

That first paragraph is comprised of words that are understandable and easy to read, it's that second that's a doozy. In so many words, the second paragraph says, "Please hold onto your stock for 10 days! Please! PLEASE! We're working on something!" As analysts have been saying since this whole debacle started, this acquisition is an inevitability. Sorry Take-Two, and good luck.

Also, here:

Fiduciary: of, relating to, or involving a confidence or trust: as a: held or founded in trust or confidence b: holding in trust c: depending on public confidence for value or currency <fiduciary fiat money> (Yeah, we had to look it up. Fiduciary? COME ON!)

The Sky Was Not, In Fact, Brought Down (DLC Review)

This evening, I finally got the chance to sink my teeth into the first content pack for Mass Effect, "Bring Down the Sky," which was released on Monday, much to the glee of sci-fi nerds everywhere. After downloading it, I started up a new game with an existing character profile, and made quick work of the beginning parts on Eden Prime and in the Citadel. Once I got control of the Normandy, I jetted off to the Asgard system to kick some Batarian ass.

Basically, there's an asteroid orbiting the planet of Terra Nova, which is the home to some 4 million people. A group of Batarians (those nasty slavers we've heard whispers of in the game, but haven't actually seen until now) has hijacked the facilities on the asteroid and are using three fusion torches to blast the asteroid on a collision course with Terra Nova. Of course, our delightful Commander Shepard is the only one ballsy enough to go in and save the day.

It was a pretty standard mission, mainly just "go disable these things, then go there and do that" sort of thing. But it introduced some interesting characters and had some good action, and the scenery was pretty. Overall, it was a nice little 90 minutes of alien fun. I wish that all, or at least some, of the side missions in the core game were as solid as this, rather than the same ol' probes on the same ol' maps with the same ol' dead Salarians.

Now I'm going to try and get the rest of the achievements for the game, then sit tight for Mass Effect 2, which is totally going to blow my panties off.

Burnout Paradise: This Can't Be Good For My E-Brake

Developer: Criterion Games
Publisher: EA

The latest incarnation of the Burnout series arrived at my doorstep the other day via GameFly -- Burnout Paradise. It's a fun, arcade-style racer that focuses less on the technical side of driving (i.e. Gran Turismo) and more on the pedal to the floor, high speed, high risk aspect (i.e. Flatout.) The game takes place in the fictional Paradise City, where the grass is green, etc... You're given an enormous city to explore and tasked with successfully completing literally hundreds of shortcuts, super jumps, billboards, and races.

Races vary from straight up street racing to 'Marked Man', where you have to make it to a destination before mafioso style "not-Cadillacs" total your racer. There's also 'Road Rage' races where you 'Take Down' as many competitors as possible. You can fix your car at an auto shop or choose from about 150 different new ones at the junk yard. You can also refill your boost by driving through a gas station (For 3.23 a gallon).

Burnout is a very easy game to play, which is good because that makes it accessible. I certainly enjoyed it for a few hours, but the game doesn't offer much else. Most of the races (whether marked man or road rage) all seem to blend together after a few hours of playing -- also, the music is absolute horse shit. You'll want to turn down the volume promptly unless you enjoy Axl Rose skull-fucking you through a bandana.

Burnout's most redeeming quality is the online play. You simply press a button and you're automatically placed exactly where you were in offline play. Online you can race other players, complete challenges, and of course wreck other people's shit. If you complete a task in online play, like finding a Super Jump, it also registers that you completed that in your offline game.

All in all, Burnout Paradise is a fun game to pick up for a few hours, but doesn't have much replay value. Unless you're a hardcore fan of racers that are more arcade oriented than simulation oriented, rent this game -- otherwise it's basically just a racing version of a scavenger hunt.

Motorstorm 2 Details Announced, Release Date Hazy

Playstation 3 staging a massive comeback in 2008 you say? You must be pulling our chain, world. It looks to us here at QP like Sony is beginning to bet on the right pony -- LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid 4, Home (we think?) and now Motorstorm but like, a full game? You don't say! The teaser trailer above looks sweet but isn't exactly in-game engine. Honestly, we'd be way more excited about a crazy looking new Ridge Racer, but that's just us -- we're crazy.

For serious though, Motorstorm 2 should be shipping, "this Autumn," and when it does, it's bringin' (to tha extreem!) 16 new levels and 16 player online racing (sensing a theme here?) You can also play three other friends locally with split-screen. Sounds like Sony's doing the right thing here and making a full Motorstorm like they should have in the first place -- though we doubt it'll be at the right price for what they're offering. For the full press release, follow this jump (but we don't suggest it.)

Bioshock 2 Announced, Due in Fiscal Q4 2009

In a press release issued by parent company Take-Two Interactive Software, Inc., the development of Bioshock 2 is apparently under way -- but not by 2K Boston or 2K Australia. Just north of San Francisco, 2K Marin will be developing the still way the hell off game, though series creator Ken Levine, "will be working on Bioshock 2.", according to Chairman Strauss Zelnick.

Also mentioned in the press release was the super exciting news that Carnival Games, the 1 million plus selling Wii title, will be cashing in coming out this Summer. They also mentioned something about a Carnival Games spin-off regarding mini-golf, but seriously, are you actually interested in that? Really? 'Cause we'll write about it if you are, but I'm putting my money against it. Start speculating about that Bioshock 2 plot, as we certainly have. Is it actually part of an element themed trilogy, the next being Geoshock and then Aeroshock? Ok, that wasn't even our idea, but it'd be hilarious. What do you think the next Bioshock will be?

Black Wing Foundation Announces Salvation

Black Wing Foundation (known for...this?) recently announced work on a new project for the Xbox 360 and PC, due out in "Quarter 2 of 2009," named Salvation. The game itself as a premise sounds great, if not a bit derivative: future dystopia (seen it) where the world government engineered Judgment Day with stem-cell technology (never seen it.) It even runs on the Valve Source Engine (didn't Half-Life do the whole future dystopia thing on that engine a little while ago?) Sure to draw controversy, Salvation re-enacts the death of Jesus Christ as well as, "The Antichrist" (soooo, we're going to finally see the death of the evil bastard that created the Cornballer?)

Though the premise sounds interesting, us here at QPHQ will wait for way more information (screens, preview write-ups) regarding Salvation, as we've been fooled before (we're looking at you, Turning Point: Fall of Liberty.) If you want the rest of the paltry info (all heavily subject to change) straight from the butcher's mouth, you can find it at the Black Wing Foundation Website. Oh, and in case you were wondering...yes, Burnout Paradise and Professor Layton did arrive, today, from Gamefly. Wooo!

Reasons to Believe: Insomniac Games

If this isn't reason to go out and buy a PS3 (yes, Insomniac Games only makes games for Sony), then we don't know what is. Pffft, LittleBigPlanet -- whateva. These guys know how to make a ridiculous music video. If this video doesn't make you believe in the Playstation brand, nothing will (and you probably don't have any soul.) That being said, we hope more than Resistance 2 is coming from these guys. We get the feeling they could do better...way better.

Error Codes Plague Brawl Online

Have you found yourself, over the past couple days, alone at three in the morning, GameCube controller still in hand, ready for more Brawl, although your friends all went home? You may have been tempted by that Nintendo Wi-Fi option -- which may or may not have resulted in you seeing the screen pictures above. Us here at QPHQ have exhaustively researched the error code, only to find out it means, according to Nintendo, "Our experience shows that error messages within this range are typically caused by temporary network issues with the Nintendo Wi-Fi Connection. If there is a problem with the network, our technician's will work to get the service back up as soon as possible. Please retry your connection later."

Sooooo, in so many words, sit on your ass and keep waiting. It might work soon. Thanks, Nintendo! Apparently the option for connecting directly to friends has been working without pause and as far as the Spectator Mode goes, it works flawlessly -- if your only interest is betting on other peoples' matches. The few online matches we have been able to get working have been lag ridden messes, which we'll attribute to the huge amount of people trying to play online at the same time. Still, not an excuse, just an explanation. How about y'all out there in the middle of these giant, interconnected tubes? Any luck?

Brawl Blastoff: The Midnight Release of Super Smash Bros. Brawl (Philly Love Edition)

This past Saturday night marked a big night for a lot of folks out there in the wide world of videogames -- and not just because G4 showed Ninja Warrior for 10 whole hours. No, friends, this past Saturday marked the release of Super Smash Bros: Brawl, a seminal game in the lexicon of great games, and one we'll be playing here around QPHQ for years to come, if the Nintendo Wi-Fi connection would work...

To commemorate (and capitalize) one of the larger release events since Halo 3, GameStop stores around the nation held Brawl tournaments just before the midnight launch. As you would imagine, QP was there to cover (and participate) in one such tournament -- in Northeast Philadelphia. We were told to arrive early, as the tournament would start at 9:00 p.m. and they were assuming folks would be showing up starting around 8:00 or 8:30 p.m., which turned out to be fairly accurate.

Josh (lovingly pictured above), the first person to arrive at GameStop and at very least, the first person in line, showed up from Cheltenham (a 'burb of Philadelphia) around 8:20 or so, though we're not sure whether or not he knows Mario can't get the raccoon suit in Brawl. It was a bitter-cold Philly night and the wind whipping around the side of the building probably didn't help anyone either -- the GameStop employees did their best to expedite our wait time and started sign-ups for the tourney promptly at 9:00 p.m.

After everyone grabbed their number (only 65 spots available, all filled), the crowd was dispersed until 10:00 p.m. when the tournament would actually begin. This left myself and fellow QP'er Shawn Annable playing versus mode in New Super Mario Bros. for the hour in my car, an epic battle in and of itself. Soon though, the hour arrived and the friendly GameStop employees opened the doors to somewhere between 60 and 120 gamers, anxious to get their hands on Brawl.

First up, explanations: the rules of the store, the tournament and the evening (including a long, legal disclaimer) were presented humorously by an employee rockin' a Nintendo World store track jacket. The same employee, when asked whether the store had any Wavebirds in stock, replied with, "No, we've been searching and the closest GameStop with them is in Massachusetts. We have GameStop wireless ones, but they're garbage. Don't bother." Good to hear a bit of honesty from retail every now and again. One final plug for Papa John's (who sponsored the event with 10 free pizzas -- terrible, terrible pizzas) and the tournament began. One Wii demo station was set up running a copy while a t.v. located on the other side of the store displayed another.

Little did we know, hidden amongst our ranks, were ringers. The gentleman pictured above came reppin' his Major League Gaming skills (though he was knocked out in round three of five). The buzz in the room rose steadily from a quiet din early on to out and out shouting, trash talking and name calling by the end of the tournament. "Come on MLG!", was heard steadily throughout the night, directed at the previously mentioned ringer. The second match in, the first smash ball appeared, to much "Ooohs" and "Ahhhs" from the crowd. After 10 or 15 matches, the GameStop employee managing the Wii demo station shouted, "27!" and I headed in for my match...

(Though I'm not much for tooting my own horn, this QP Editor may have made it to the last round of the tournament, using none other than my main man Lucas, of Mother fame. Toot toot, bitches.)

According to GameStop's rules, all of the tournament competitors had to use a Wiimote and Nunchuk, a caveat that elicited many groans of disappointment from the GameCube controller loyalists in the crowd (roughly everyone, ourselves included.) The controls explained beforehand, the many gamers there traded Wii Friend Codes and waited their turns, joining in with the crowd for, "Oooooooh!"s every now and again, swapping information about the game itself and discussing their history with the franchise.

Perhaps the Papa John's delivery man put it best when he said, "I've never seen anything like this for a videogame! Y'all sound like you're playing Madden!" If he only knew.

Around 11:40 p.m. the tournament drew to a close (tears, running down my face) and the crowd excitedly dispersed around the store, anxiously awaiting the midnight release. A long line began forming within the store, made up of tournament competitors. Folks outside began lining up, arriving just to pick up the game and not participate in any of the tournament madness. After a countdown from 11:59 to midnight, the first copies were handed out and people began rushing out of the store, directly to their quietly waiting Nintendo Wii's. The Brawl has begun.

Casual Monday -- Basketball is My Life Edition

Right off the bat, early Monday morning, QP is lying to you. While all of us here at QPHQ are heavily inspired by Charles Barkley's actions as a heroic basketball player in the future -- we are of course talking about Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden, the ridiculous (and fully developed) role-playing game offered as freeware -- none of us here actively participate in the sport (or any sport for that matter, other than Calvinball.)

We're sorry about the lies upfront and we hope you'll recover; Allow the voluptuous text boxes flowing from Mr. Barkley's 16-bit face sooth your wounds -- like a Great Fairy Fountain, if you will. If you gobble up this week's casual offering before next Monday, well, you have too much time on your hands. Anyways, you should be playing Brawl. Even if the enthusiast press doesn't understand why people love Super Smash Bros. so much, you know better, you little Sherlock Holmes, you. Now go save the world, in turns, so that you can play basketball, so that everyone can play basketball -- assuming you'd want to play basketball of course.

Week-End Podcast Roundup -- Exploding News Edition

Hello everyone out there in the middle of the tubes (yes, those large, interconnected ones) and welcome to our weekly podcast roundup, featuring some new faces this week. The industry side of things saw some interesting developments with Blu-ray while the arts side of things witnessed a very serious GiantBomb, though the explosion has yet to come (or so they say.)

The podcast roundup is fired up this week with newcomer Arrow Pointing Down, which is quickly becoming one of our favorites, often because of their off-the-cuff drink reviews (including an addendum to the most recent podcast in order to try Carl Jr's', "Cap'n' Crunch Milkshake" on the air) as well as Jeff Gerstmann/Ryan Davis' unique combination of banter -- see their new site here. And so, the list goes...

Arrow Pointing Down Podcast (feat. Jeff Gerstmann, Ryan Davis, and Alex Navarro)
Joystiq Podcast (feat. Chris Grant, Ludwig Kietzmann and Justic McElroy)
The CAGcast (feat. CheapyD and Wombat)
The 1UP Show and 1UP Yours Podcast (feat. Garnett Lee, Shane Bettenhausen, Bryan Intihar, and Shawn Elliott)

Unfortunately, though we had it on good information that one Phil Harrison would be guesting on the weekly Game Theory podcast this past Wednesday, as is often the case with life, things didn't work out. Oh well chaps, maybe next week. We'll see you bright and early Monday morning to bring you your weekly dose of casual enjoyment. Hasta entonces, jugadores...

Gran Turismo 5: Prologue Cars/Tracks Detailed

Alright, seriously, the reasons are stacking up to purchase a PS3. Though I haven't played any Gran Turismo since numero tres, after seeing the recently announced car list, the gearhead in me aches to tune the hell out of an old Mazda RX-7 until it's a spirit crushing, fossil fuel decimating, 700hp beast. Yes folks, the details, they are a-spillin' from across the Pacific regarding Gran Turismo 5: Prologue. Sony didn't just tell us about the cars though, we also got the names of the six tracks included upon purchase.

Among the notable tracks, Daytona International and Fuji Speedway are most recognizable. Furthermore, some features were discussed in the press release...

"Drift Mode -- The player's drifting technique is measured based on drift angles, racing lines, and speeds within evaluation zones located at various turns on the course."

And the ever popular...

"In Depth Car Tuning -- Players have the ability to adjust the vehicle's performance, including power, weight, tires and suspension."


Let's be clear: This is still, for all intents and purposes, a very nice and somewhat polished, tech demo. It's not the first time Polyphony Digital and Sony have released a "prologue" version of the Gran Turismo series and betting on them, most likely not the last. In fairness, this doesn't seem like a cash-in so much as something to hold over fans who would otherwise be left waiting for what seems like eternity while Polyphony finishes work on Gran Turismo 5. At $40 (and that's real bucks, not space bucks), we ask you, QP'er: Who's buyin'?

The Sims 3 Info Coming Soon

As a girl gamer who is only interested in The Sims and the Imagine games (Babyz totally rocked my socks, but I STILL need to check out Fashion Designer, damnit), this bit of not-so-new-news tickled me pink: more information about The Sims 3 will be released on March 19, assuming the game's website isn't made of lies. Yes, we all knew it was coming, but now we know when we'll know....um...more information. Yay?

Activision CEO Hints at New Guitar Hero Peripherals, Call of Duty MMO Future

In a speech given at the 2008 Morgan Stanley Technology Conference in Dana Point, California yesterday, Activision/Actiblizzard/Blizzavision Chairman and CEO Robert Kotick made some interesting statements regarding the future of two of Activision's biggest franchises -- Call of Duty and Guitar Hero. However, Activision would like you to know this before you know anything about this speech:

"During the course of the presentation, Activision may make forward-looking statements regarding future events or the future financial performance of the company. We wish to caution you that these statements are only predictions and actual events or results may differ materially. We refer you to the company's last Form 10-K and Form 10-Q for a discussion of important risk factors that could cause the actual results to differ materially from those discussed during the course of the presentation."

For serious? So, hey, we're making these statements about the future of our company but, you know, don't take it too seriously. Anyways, there was real news. Regarding the future of Guitar Hero, there were musings regarding getting it into more, Asianer, homes and how they're going to accomplish that with new pahdnah Blizzard.

More interesting though was the discussions regarding the future of the Call of Duty franchise:

"When you think about other properties that we own and control like Call of Duty, and what would be the natural evolution of a property like Call of Duty into a massively multiplayer environment...how do you monetize that?"

Indeed Mr. Kotick, how do you monetize that? Your new friends at Blizzard monetized the hell out of their over nine million worldwide subscriber strong World of Warcraft -- we're sure you guys can work out something (you bastards.)

Creepiest Gallery Ever: Link Cosplayers

Undoubtedly, you awoke on this sunny Wednesday expecting to see some androgynous ladies, right? Well QP is all over that for you. Oh, I'm sorry, did you say you also want them dressed as Link from The Legend of Zelda series? Bang. Nailed it. The folks at DS Fanboy have gathered an entirely too large gallery of this lady and her friend as they pose in as many LoZ instances as they can. And no, until we have confirmation that these ladies are in fact over the legal age limit (that's like, 12 in Hyrule, right?), we make no statements regarding...anything. Click here for the whole gallery -- perv. (Yeah, we looked too...)

Phil Harrison Becomes New President of Infogrames (Atari)

You have to wonder though: Did the rats, in their tremendous hurry to flee the sinking ship that is Infogrames/Atari, pause to look at the English beanpole as he landed with a great thud on the ships hull? A question we may never know the answer to. We do know this (from the press release):

"Infogrames Entertainment announces today [3.3.08] the appointment of Phil Harrison as President and Directeur General of Infogrames Entertainment, reporting to David Gardner. Phil Harrison also joins the Board of Directors

With the recent appointment of David Gardner as CEO, Phil and David will together form the basis of a transformational leadership team at Infogrames that will grow the Atari brand into a leading online game company. Phil Harrison will oversee the Studios and content development for the group."

Few CEO's are as transparent and genuine as Phil Harrison and we're glad to see him taking the reins of a company that could certainly use the help. Considering Alone in the Dark is the only major title we know of "coming this year" from Harrison's new stomping grounds, he's certainly, "got his work cut out for him." (We counted at least four news stories already noting that Harrison's, "got his work cut out for him.") Us here at QP wish Mr. Harrison good luck with his pre-cut workload at Infogrames -- if anyone can help that sinking ship, it's him.

Dell, Apple Courting Sony for Blu-ray Notebooks

If you weren't already convinced that Blu-ray has completely dominated HD DVD, here's more in the vein of coffin nails: apparently Apple and Dell are both heavily courting Sony for Blu-ray drives on their respective notebooks. According to Electronista, Apple's Macbook Pro could come sporting a Blu-ray writable drive as early as...right this minute:

"Development is said to have been progressing far enough that the drives may have appeared in the most recent update to the portables but were held back by quality issues with both the blue laser and slot-load mechanism, forcing Apple to postpone its plans."

Sigh. Much like the iPhone, we're waiting for a lower price point and a generation or two of bugs worked out before we even start looking at any shiny new Apple products. And as for Dell, well, take a wild guess as to which route they're taking with Blu-ray (a feature already optionally available on certain Dell notebooks):

"...Dell plans to offer one of the least expensive Blu-ray notebooks yet, according to statements by technology strategist Brian Zucker. Without providing many details, the expert claims his company will have a portable below the $1,000 mark in March that can at least read Blu-ray media, setting a new point of entry for the format."

We don't know about y'all, but us here at QP, we still don't even own a PS3 (not for lack of wanting one, mind you.) Blu-ray sure looks nice, but it also still has a high barrier to entry. Aren't we supposed to be planning for a digital distribution future anyways? Yep, we heard that one before too.