Thursday, May 22, 2008

Nothin' Says Lovin' Like a Paper Bag Face on Fire

We done gone up and moved! Though you may have already been seeking us out at Quarterplay.com, we picked up everything you see here and dropped it directly into the welcoming arms of WordPress. So that's that. Goodbye old servers, you did us well.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Attention Idiot Buyers: Get PS3/MGS4 Bundle For 3x MSRP!

Unsurprisingly, the PlayStation 3/Metal Gear Solid 4 gunmetal grey bundle that everyone is going apeshit over is now being whored out on eBay at ludicrous prices, most hovering around $1,000-$1,500, and one going up to $9,999. What. The. Fuck. I hate stupid rich people.

Am I the only one who thinks the gunmetal version is bullshit? Yes, it's pretty. Yes, I'd like one instead of the black. But it has a 40GB hard drive and is $100 more (or $1,000 more if you're a dumbass and buy it off some scalper on eBay). Granted it comes with the limited edition MGS4, but that's only $25 more than the plain jane edition. And doesn't the 40GB model have issues with backwards compatibility? Whatever. I'll be perfectly content with my 80GB black model when it arrives on my doorstep in June, thank you very much.

Georgia Wants You to Build Video Games

Georgia recently passed the 2008 Georgia Entertainment Industry Investment Act, designed to attract film, music, and (most importantly to us) gaming firms to the state in an effort to boost revenue. The Act offers a 20 percent flat-tax credit to any production company that spends more than $500,000 on a year's worth of production and post-production. The credit is specifically aimed at animation, interactive content and video game development.

In 2005, Georgia passed a similar act, which led to over a billion dollars in economic impact between 2005 and 2007. Numbers have been slower this year, however, because other states caught on and started offering competetive development incentives as well, according to the Atlanta Business Chronicle.

These kinds of incentives offer further proof that the gaming industry is holding its own against big media players like the music and film industries (GTA IV's effect on Iron Man's box-office performance being the most recent battle between the two industries.)

But why wouldn't a state want to bring in game developers? It's a clean industry that's growing larger everyday. Georgia is smart to lure up-start companies to their state and offer an East Coast alternative to California that isn't New York City. We are a bit concerned about what it will do the the quality of games being released -- next up, Wii Cow Milking.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

All Your Base Are Belong To Us

"Houston we have a problem." That problem being the veritable deluge of excellent gaming product flooding all consoles since last august. It's a miracle any of us here at QP managed to finish our schooling. Riding on the coat tails of that wave comes Space Invaders Extreme a new look for an old favorite. Features power-ups, boss battles, and unrelenting pretty hot and tempting techno beats. Drops June 17 2008 C.E. (that's the common era for those wondering).

It's a good thing we have Hannah Montana: Music Jam to keep us occupied in the mean time. And just let you in on what kind of crazy prepubescent adventures you'll be getting yourself into we've got a screen shot right here for you (You're guess is definetly better and more mature than mine.) I mean who even ever heard of Ninja Gaiden DS?

Monday, May 19, 2008

(Mis)Adventures In Wonderland: The Grand Theft Auto IV Review

Developer: Rockstar North
Publisher: Rockstar Games -- Take Two Interactive

Where to start?


Let's all be glad Burnout Paradise got to "Welcome To The Jungle" before Rockstar.

This installment of the GTA series places you in the boots of Niko Bellic, an incorrigible immigrant from the Eastern Bloc who committed unspeakable atrocities in his mysterious past and has now been lured to the United States by his cousin with promises of money and women. Yeah, that sounds like a good place to start. Developer Rockstar Games put a tremendous amount of effort into this title and it really shows with jaw dropping incidents, stunning graphics, and a compelling storyline.

First thing's first, this issue of GTA has a strong emphasis on story. The characters are still blown out caricatures, but honestly would the game be as fun (or as funny) if Brucie wasn't always screaming about being genetically superior or commanding you to 'stay alpha'? I don't think so. In the story line, Rockstar wasn't looking for reality. They've set up, I believe, an intriguing though at some points intentionally campy story that really keeps you guessing. However one of the problems the game faces is that there are so many stories and characters that it's easy to forget what's happening. Especially if you're like me, going back and forth between main character missions.

Side missions abound, one example being you're tasked with making friends and keeping them your friends. This sucks. By the halfway point your phone is filled with contacts all wanting to get drunk or throw darts (or both.) Sometimes I just wanted to search the alleys or complete side missions but Little Jacob wanted me to drive him to Cluckin' Bell (Cluckin Bell! Awright rasta) and after I was done with that Dwayne wanted to bring me down with all his ex-con bullshit. You're given an incentive to hang out with these people though -- if you get them to like you enough they provide services for you, such as helicopter rides, discount weapons, backup etc. Careful though: if you're not friendly enough they won't pick up your phone calls. I wouldn't have minded hanging out with them until you unlock the perk, and then always having the perk from that point on, but it gets incredibly tedious hanging out with people, even if they do have something different to say each time they get in the car.

Aside from the veteran side missions of car theft, vigilante justice, and street racing, the main missions feel like there's a reason to be doing them. It's not so much go find this guy and shoot his car until it explodes anymore. Many times a car chase will deliberately be difficult because Rockstar is leading you to a spot where the guys you're chasing bail out and take up defensive positions in a house or park (for instance.) They've also designed a ton of buildings to specifically be a space you fight in, which adds an 'indoors' dimension lacking in previous GTA's.

The story asks you to make decisions affecting future business opportunities (and business partners for that matter.) The result changes the storyline and (depending on your perspective) the entire outcome of the game, which adds yet another layer of replayability, as if we needed anymore.

Rockstar made a good decision this time around by focusing their efforts into making a few gameplay elements really fun and compelling, instead of spreading them out over a ton of semi-fun activities (i.e. jetpacks, planes, sky diving, property ownership.) They implemented the same idea with gamespace as well. One of the things that's been floating around our conversations here at QP is how space in GTA IV is much more useful. Sure, San Andreas was probably the largest GTA in terms of space, but most of that was open fields and dense forests that saw at most three or four missions. Here, every inch of Liberty City is worth scouring, and you'll find yourself at almost every out of the way warehouse or crumbled building complex by the end of the story.

The gameplay in this installment shows great leaps and bounds (within the GTA universe) in some areas, and falls flat in others. Probably the newest and best aspect is the completely revamped aiming system. Pull the left trigger to auto aim, then use the right thumbstick pick your shot: head, hand, foot, etc. You can also go the much harder and arguably more manlier route by free aiming. Free aiming requires you to hold the left trigger half way, and allows you to have complete control over what you're shooting at -- very useful for shooting exploding barrels or car tires, not practical at all for taking down baddies.

Rockstar also added a cover system that serves its purpose fairly well. The cover system is pretty sticky, which is good for missions that are designed for you to use the cover system. However, if you get caught up in a gunfight on a street crowded with cars or stuck in a tight space, it's nearly impossible to predict where Niko will take cover. You can also jump from cover-to-cover a la Gears of War -- and from my experiences it works much better than Gears.

Your environment in GTA IV is much more conducive to losing police in alleys and backyards. They've given Niko a quick hop over smaller objects, and the ability to hang on to and shimmy to and fro on a ledge. Ladders provide easy vertical access providing rooftop shootouts and building-to-building firefights. In general, getting around on foot is easier and way more fun than previous installments.

Unfortunately, GTA IV still suffers from a case of what I like to call 'The Walkies.' The walkies have been in every GTA since they've gone 3-D and it refers to the phenomenon of not being able to stop your character on a precise spot. Walking near a ledge is a death wish because when you let go of the thumbstick Niko inexplicably takes one or two more steps. Forget turning around quickly because Mr. Bellic needs more room than most cruise ships to complete his semi-circular procedure before finally facing the other direction (he must have hurt his knee or hip in the war or something.) Whatever you do, DO NOT combine any of the aforementioned moves with the sprint button as you'll inevitably end up looking down the barrel of a cop's shotgun.

Driving is very fun and controllable, though it takes a while to get used to; once you're set though, it's easy like Sunday morning. GTA IV also desperately needs an easier way to switch guns -- how about the 'B' button guys? Come on! It's arguable that current-gen consoles shouldn't even use d-pads anymore, let alone poorly implemented ones (yes, I'm looking at you, Xbox 360), but I shouldn't have to stop moving if I want to switch my weapon.

For my money, GTA IV is the best looking game around, especially when you consider everything the engine is doing. The graphics sport a hint of Crackdown in a very subtle, comic book, black outline kind of way (stylized anyone?) Every block is extremely detailed and completely unique which really helps with navigating the four islands. A wide selection of cars to choose from, all sporting variations on sun roofs, convertibles, and gold trim, among other things, help to keep things fresh. There's also a wide selection of people to run down...or interact with -- whatever.

The only problem I saw with the graphics is that sometimes the details on the road surface will disappear for a second, or objects will pop in(to) view at the last second. This isn't a huge problem though and rarely does it affect the gameplay. The huge variation of cars, people and city blocks, combined with GTA IV's impressive draw distance really bring together the environment like none of it's predecessors. Take a helicopter ride night... tet-tet, shh... just do it.

Multiplayer is intensely addicting. It's bad enough that I still want to play the single player game after putting in seven hours in one day but on top of that they have to give us totally awesome multiplayer? Play anything. It's all fun, we promise. Just be sure you get a host who knows what they're doing. This is important as there's a myriad of game variables just waiting to be tweaked: weather, spawn distance, re-spawn time, amount of traffic...it seriously goes on like this for quite some time -- and they all can seriously affect how fun and fair the game is. However one element that must be changed is re-spawn distance. If it's set to 'near' you're just going to be spawned right next to the person who killed you. You're going to want some time and space to get stocked again after you're hit in any game mode.

Speaking of modes, GTA IV multiplayer sports cops and robbers (just like it sounds), street racing, deathmatch, co-op missions, and perhaps the most addicting: free mode (among others.) In free mode you simply wreak havoc on friends and the dear citizens of Liberty City for as long as you like. No rules.

Make no mistake about it, it's very easy to get caught up in all the hype surrounding this game. Mostly, said hype is justified. There will be moments when you curse the game for it's somewhat clumsy controls or lack of checkpoint system (I have to drive this dump truck to Broker, again?), but for every moment that plays smoothly, GTA IV shines brilliantly and constantly demonstrates why it indeed deserves the title of most hyped game of 2008.

Casual Monday -- What Ubisoft Needs to Do Edition

They need to steal this idea and run with it immediately, that's what they need to do! Classic Prince of Persia fans take note, Armor Games' Sleepless Knight - Assassin runs a lot like you'd expect a combination of Assassin's Creed, Prince of Persia and Lode Runner to -- the levels themselves are puzzles, the guards are ruthless and your character (Lucy) just can't help but collect inconveniently placed 'coins.'

If it weren't for the squirrelly controls on my laptop's keyboard, this game would be near Portal-level clean in it's ability to (enjoyably) present an entire game in a short period of time -- editing is key in these types of games, folks. However, on the exact opposite end of things, our number one complaint with SKA (like the aforementioned Portal) is it's shortness. That's correct -- we are simultaneously praising and damning a single element of SKA's entirety. It's a wonderful game that we're sure to replay but we can't help but shake the feeling we'd like a little more of a challenge (in the form of additional levels.) Oh, and we'd tell you about the story but seriously, you don't care that much. It's a 20 minute game -- you don't need a story, though they do provide one (and elegantly at that.)

Now get on that, Ubisoft. Check's in the mail, right? Thaaaanks.

Final Fantasy Tactics A2 Gets European Release

Square Enix apparently noticed that their little Final Fantasy property is kinda sorta popular and that it makes their wallets fat and their fans happy to release sequels galore. That's why they're releasing Final Fantasy Tactics A2: Grimoire of the Rift for the Nintendo DS on June 27th across Europe. No word yet on a release anywhere else, but I think it's safe to assume that it will make its way across the pond eventually. Here's hoping the battle system is better than the first one, which was absolutely horrid (please don't kill me, FFT fans.)

Sunday, May 18, 2008

April NDP's: Lesson 2

As we previously mentioned, the April sales numbers for the gaming industry have massive implications for where things are headed in this GTA IV-centric gaming quarter. Though impressive sales of the game weren't exactly a major blow to the Nintendo Wii, the game's impact on this month's sales numbers are inarguable (thanks mainstream media, for your lack of investigation!)

In case you missed it, the system sales for April were:

  1. Wii: 714,200
  2. Nintendo DS: 414,800
  3. PSP: 192,700
  4. Xbox 360: 188,000
  5. PlayStation 3: 187,100
  6. PlayStation 2: 124,400
Despite the release of the best-selling media in history, Xbox 360 and Playstation 3 had relatively poor sales figures in April. Playstation 3 barely outsold Playstation 2 (that's two-- the old one). Meanwhile, the Wii continued it's rampage of domination, boosted by the release of Mario Kart Wii.

Next Generation has a pretty in-depth analysis of what the GTA IV release means to the console-war.

Arguably, Liberty City is more fun on a 360 than it is on a PS3 (though we couldn't tell you the difference.) And though the gaming public at large is spending their time arguing about native resolutions and pop-in, the poor sales figures for both consoles proves that not all consumers are looking for an expansive, in-depth gaming experience. Most just want to go curling, man.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Week-End Podcast Roundup -- Not At Gamer's Day Edition

It's raining...still. We're still not in San Francisco, furiously running from one developer's Gamer's Day to another, trying desperately to cover everything we can -- and that's a damn shame. We're still whining! Many apologies -- alas, we can present you with your weekly bevy of humor, romance, drama and videogame news, all wrapped up in nice little linked bows awaiting your eardrums. As you may imagine, Garnett Lee is happy to inform you the weekend is without a doubt, entirely confirmed. (seriously not a rumor)

GFW Radio (feat. Jeff Green, Shawn Elliott, Robert Ashley, Sean Malloy, and Ryan Scott)
The GiantBombcast (feat. Jeff Gerstmann and Ryan Davis)
Joystiq Podcast (feat. Chris Grant, Ludwig Kietzmann and Justic McElroy)
The CAGcast
(feat Cheapy D and Wombat)
The 1UP Show and 1UP Yours Podcast (feat. Garnett Lee, David Ellis, and Brad Shoemaker)

Though we're not normally prone to doing this kind of thing, we're taking the opportunity to point out a couple of interesting items on the web we found during the week. Maybe you've seen them, maybe you haven't -- either way, they're certainly worth noting. [get on with it!] Alright alright, here they are:

1.) With the release of Penny Arcade Adventures: On the Rain Slick Precipice of Darkness this coming week, Jerry "Tycho" Holkins and Mike "Gabe" Krahulik have been posting a pre-game comic on their digital distribution site, The Greenhouse. It's meant to reveal a bit of backstory on the characters, but honestly only serves to get us more excited about this sure to be hilarious game. If you're a fan of the Penny Arcade guys, you'll undoubtedly enjoy this like we did.

2.) Surfer Girl has finished reviewing Star Wars! In her/his last post evar, elusive rumor blog Surfer Girl Reviews Star Wars leaves us with no text -- simply an amazing piece on women's yogurt advertising. And with that, she/he is out. It's been fun.

3.) Apparently (breaking news!), LucasArts has just joined the fracas of developers choosing not to renew their membership with the Entertainment Software Association (ESA). They will still be present (at very least) at this year's E3, but according to Margaret Grohne, Director of LucasArts Public Relations, "We can confirm that LucasArts is no longer a member of the ESA. As a company we are still committed to bringing consumers the best interactive experience possible and support the ESA's mission in the industry." Big things are shaking down with the ESA, just not sure what's causing it all yet.

And now, try and enjoy your weekend with all this on your plate.

April NPD's: Lesson One

The NDP Group's report on April sales for gaming were released yesterday. Interestingly, GTA IV was at the top for the 360 -- and came in at third for PS3. While everyone has been over and over how the game sold zillions of copies in its first 24 hours on April 29, it's interesting to look at its sales in April compared to the other big release of the month (Mario Kart Wii, anyone?) It blew Mario Kart and every other April release out of the water, in just one day, as predicted.

Here's the breakdown of April's sales:

Games:

  1. 360 GTA IV: 1,850,000
  2. Wii Mario Kart w/ wheel: 1,120,000
  3. PS3 GTA IV: 1,000,000
  4. Wii Play: 360,000
  5. Wii Super Smash Bros. Brawl: 326,000
  6. PS3 Gran Turismo 5: Prologue: 224,000
  7. DS Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Darkness: 202,000
  8. DS Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Time: 202,000
  9. Wii Guitar Hero III: 152,000
  10. 360 Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare: 141,000
Systems:
  1. Wii: 714,200
  2. Nintendo DS: 414,800
  3. PSP: 192,700
  4. Xbox 360: 188,000
  5. PlayStation 3: 187,100
  6. PlayStation 2: 124,400
There's a whole lot more to be analyzed in these prophetic numbers, so stay tuned. But here's one more number: In April, the videogame industry had $1.23 billion in sales. $1.23 billion.

$1.23 billion (000,000,000).

Thanks to Game|Life.

As If "Family Game Night" Wasn't a Scary Enough Idea...

That's right, EA's digitzing Connect Four (and five other Hasbro board games you may have heard of) for a Wii/PS2 game titled Hasbro Family Game Night -- another title harnessing user-created content creatively, this time in the form of large family arguments. Other than the classic versions of Battleship, Yahtzee, Connect Four, Sorry and Boggle packed onto the disc you also get a new version of Sorry, gastronomically titled "Sorry! Sliders" -- let's hope this doesn't involve Jerry O'Connell either.

According directly to the horse's mouth, "...families can enjoy familiar classic Hasbro board games or throw in a fun spin with new versions like Connect Four Power Chips, Boggle Portal Cubes, Reverse Yahtzee and Battleship Barrage – which add fresh dimensions and challenges to these legendary favorites." FRESH DIMENSIONS?! Well frankly, we're terrified by that statement. Can you imagine watching television and all of a sudden there was a fresh dimension? Would you just go into the erotic cakes store? Let's be honest: we all would.

GameStop has the title listed at $39.99 and $29.99 for the Wii and PS2 respectively, so it's got that going for it (which is nice.) Can you tell it's a rainy Friday with all the t.v. and movie references? See y'all later on in the roundup!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

BREAKING: GTA IV's Liberty City based on New York City

Okay, so you already knew that, but a bunch of sites have popped up comparing specific buildings IRL (in real life) to Grand Theft Auto IV.

All previous installments of GTA have been based on specific locations, but developer Rockstar Games has taken the similarities to a new level this time around, and some NYC politicians are less than pleased.

"Setting Grand Theft Auto in the safest big city in America would be like setting Halo in Disneyland," said City Councilman Peter Vallone, chairman of the Council's Public Safety Committee [New York Daily News].

While the idea of sticking Mickey Mouse or Goofy with a plasma grenade is incredibly distracting, the point is that GTA IV is a better game for its similarities to real-life New York City. As with any piece of pop-culture that even mentions New York, the personality of the city and the superior existence it takes to live there has become a major focus of the game. In The New York Times review of the game, they barely mention little things like the gameplay, focusing instead on how the game "almost smells like NYC." Give me a break.

Setting GTA IV in New York City elevates the game to a higher level of cultural significance. There is no cooler place, in the U.S., to set a city block ablaze or rip through the skyline at night in a helicopter. It also brings the series full circle.

Everybody has been talking about how the game's attention to detail is what makes it so great and allows it to make people-smuggling-boatloads of cash. Who wouldn't want to mow down a few Wall Street [The Exchange] investors or shoot a few Brooklyn [Broker] hipsters in the kneecap? In the same vein, the real-life landmarks make the game more fun between the missions, which is what Grand Theft Auto has always been about.

Check out some of these specific comparisons to landmarks IRL with GTA IV:

Matthew Johnston created a Flickr set with screenshots from real life and the game.

Ed Levine's New York City restaurant blog, New York Eats, takes a specific look at how places to eat in Liberty City compare to the Big Apple.

Eurogamer.net has a video comparing landmarks.

Gta4.net has, by far, the best list of comparisons with good photos and descriptions.

Strong Bad Coming To (a) Wii Near You

Sorry, nearly two years out and wii still just can't help it with the Wii jokes. Finally breaking a string of heart breaking(ly) awful press releases comes this gem: Strong Bad's Cool Game For Attractive People (video link). The point-and-click adventure is being developed by Telltale Games with collaboration from series creators Mike and Matt Chapman. We just worry that this point-and-click adventure game will essentially be a Homestar Runner episode that dips into our precious, precious Wii points (damn housing markets.) Hell, even if it's not fun to play at least it'll be funny. Drops June 2008 C.E.

Can You Kill a Legend? Apparently.

We can't help it -- at this point, we're kind of developing a theme here. Another day has passed and thus, another silly press release detailing another poor-to-middling game has washed up on the shores of QPHQ, rife with exaggerated adjectives and plenty of symbols (® and TM, specifically), patiently awaiting our careful snarkiness scrutiny.

This time it's not a game about touching sharp objects or jamming as many mini-games onto a single disc as possible (for Wii? NEVER!) but something you've totally heard of...wait for it...Cabela's Legendary Adventures! Remember all those weekends you went hunting with Pah and your black-mouthed cur Rufus? Remember all those white-tailed deer you two shot together, laughing and whooping as mead ran down your respective beards? Yeah, I don't either but you can certainly try and live out these mis-adventures in CLA when it releases this Fall. In fact, you can shoot more than just Bambi's white-tailed mother!

Yukon moose? Yup. Alaskan brown bear? You'd better believe it. Roosevelt elk? Okay, no Roosevelt elk. KIDDING! Roosevelt elk confirmed! Okay, okay, enough. This is a franchise that has existed for it's fair share of versions at this point and we're willing to bet the videogamer/hunter, just like the videogamer/car enthusiast, will run out and buy this one without hesitation.

Those of you out there waiting for your next-gen (current-gen, we're from now on calling Xbox 360 and PS3 current-gen) hunting experience will have to wait though, as Cabela's Legendary Adventures will only be released on PSP, Wii and PS2. And unlike yesterday's press release of doom, today's actually got me interested in playing a game that I've never given a shot before. Just like that. Any QP'ers out there looking forward to getting your hunt on?

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Touch Darts -- That's a Command

Continuing right along in our developing string of write-ups on games bound to sell only to the uninformed and cheap, today we bring you all the information you could possibly ever want on the newest game from Agetec, Inc.: Touch Darts. And we're worried about what GTA4 is doing to kids when games like this exist, blatantly telling commanding our children to touch sharp things? To shame! Either way, just like regretful Agetec titles Cookie & Cream and Puzzle Guzzle before it, Touch Darts sets out to entertain through mini-games and kid friendly themes (though the vast majority of dart playing in this country takes place in 21+ bars...) while simultaneously creating a game that isn't necessarily perfect on a Nintendo DS. If we've said it once, we've said it a thousand times: don't use the touch screen/microphone on the DS unless it makes sense.


Either way, according to Agetec (we feel as though they at least deserve to say their piece), "This game will make you feel as if you were really in your living room, at your friend’s house, in the pub, or in a tournament tossing darts." We're going to go all the way crazy here and guess that even if Rockstar Games themselves developed this title, ain't no way a Nintendo DS is going to emulate the pub. Maybe if there was an old drunk blowing smoke through the DS' speakers? We digress. As you can see to the right, the two tiny screens are more than chock full of information (and a watermark, thanks IGN), providing you with all pertinent information required for a real game of video darts. All in all, though this game very well may be a diamond in the rough, we're putting our money on the other pony -- any other pony -- this time. However, if you are interested, Touch Darts will be released in North America in June. Me? I'll be at the bar with Brucie, tossing darts a little differently.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Deca Sports? Yeah, We've Never Heard of it Either

And yes, it looks just as bad as you might think. However, boasting 10 sports, "...players can compete in beach volleyball, snowboard cross, badminton, basketball, curling, figure skating, archery, supercross, soccer and kart racing." and featuring waggle-icious control for every single one (oh boy! waggle curling!), Deca Sports is poised to take the 5 to 11-year old market by storm (especially at the Wal-Mart friendly price of $29.99.)

Let's be clear here folks: this game looks like junk. The trailer (which I very stupidly sat through in it's entirety) actually served to make me less interested in a game I already didn't care about -- the video equivalent of being told something meaningless while simultaneously being hit in the groin, if you will. I was left feeling anger towards the knowledge, though for reasons unrelated directly to it's content.

The cover and weak title should say enough but they don't quite convey the hopelessness found within the press release for this title. Usually feigned excitement sounds better than “With summer on the horizon, we anticipate Deca Sports being a popular choice for those looking for a fun-filled Wii experience.” Hell yes. Either way, GameRankings is already calling this game another piece for the pile of middling if not outright poor Wii games. As you might expect with a hit title like this, it's out this very minute. At least they didn't spend a lot of money on marketing, right? Seriously though, this is why I never play my Wii. If any of you out there are playing and enjoying/hating this game, feel free to drop us a line and let us know why it's amazing/terrible. Lord knows it ain't goin' on our GameFly queue. Thanks Hudson Soft.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Casual Monday -- Sticky Fun Edition

Yeah, I said it. Sticky fun. Not to be confused with sticky buns. Though this week's casual fare comes to you in the form of the much maligned adjective 'sticky,' it's gameplay is addictive and fun -- Rez-like in it's visuals and unlike nearly all shooters we've played, Tumiki Fighters serves as a demo (at this point, though it wasn't always this way) for it's older Wii-born brother, Blast Works: Build, Trade, Destroy.

The novelty of the game is simple: you're a ship, you shoot other ships and as their vessels fall, you may catch them by sticking to them and thus, they become part of your now-uber ship -- cannons and all. And yes, the eventuality of this is a bullet hell game like you wouldn't believe with some really great new ideas regarding character health and weapons upgrades.

Unfortunately, though we strive for multi-platform capable games here, Tumiki Fighters is only available for those of you running Windows. If you really like what you get here though, BW:BTD seems to be not only a capable extension of the single-player game but also incorporates a (supposedly very complex and detailed) level editor. And now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go to sleep. No one wake me up with a cold, sticky hand to the face.

Friday, May 9, 2008

Week-End Podcast Roundup -- Everyone's On Time(!) Edition

It's been more than a few weeks since we've been able to say that all the weekly podcasts came in before midnight on Friday night but hallelujah, this week we're in under the wire. Admittedly, it's hard to pay attention to writing this with Uwe Boll making an ass of himself (is that possible? isn't that like an oxymoron?) on G4's Attack of the Show...right this minute. You're already missing it! Here's some stuff to occupy yourself with for, ummmm, the rest of the weekend -- and yeah, it's sorta kinda confirmed.

GFW Radio (feat. Jeff Green, Shawn Elliott, Sean Malloy, and Ryan Scott)
The GiantBombcast (feat. Jeff Gerstmann and Ryan Davis)
Joystiq Podcast (feat. Chris Grant, Ludwig Kietzmann and Justic McElroy)
The CAGcast
(feat Cheapy D and Wombat)
The 1UP Show and 1UP Yours Podcast (feat. Garnett Lee, Shane Bettenhausen John Davison and Shawn Elliott)

We've barely begun digging into this week's podcasts as Command & Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars may or may not have just arrived, pausing the full work week experience that is Grand Theft Auto 4. We'll have more to say on the former a little later in the week, though a full-blown review would be a little much at this juncture, no? In the meantime, we've got a party to attend in Philadelphia. Maybe we'll see you there!

Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t, Oh Sh*t.


Ok so, oh sh*t, they're really making a Bioshock movie? Oh, sh*t. Directed by Gore Verbinski and written by John Logan? And it's going to be rated R? Oh, sh*t. This could be the best thing that's ever happened, or the worst aeroplane disaster of a century. Oh, Sh*t.

Via Joystiq
oh sh*t

Thursday, May 8, 2008

The Bourne Conspiracy XBL Demo

In the midst of all the frenetic GTA IV happenings we've managed to pull ourselves away for a few seconds to check out The Bourne Conspiracy demo on XBL. First impression? Lots of quick time events, for everything. Need to jump to another ledge? Quick time. Need to slide under a closing gate? Quick time. Need to spin your car around to avoid a large truck? Quick time. I don't want to say quick time events are lazy because they can be implemented well, but I'd rather play a game where the framework allows you to do these things yourself.

That being said, The Bourne Conspiracy does a pretty good job of at least making the quick time events feel natural within the game. After the first play through you get a pretty good sense of when you're going to have to use them. Better to use them constantly than randomly surprise you throughout a level. The combat system is pretty simple and allows for counter moves and some sweet finishes. Gun play feels believable at best and is actually fairly similar to GTA IV's auto-aim system. High Moon Studios also has something to prove here since traditionally movie to video game adaptations have been about as popular as a suicide bomber on a subway. So I'm surmising that this version we're seeing is pretty much what we're going to get on the release.

I can't say I didn't have fun playing the demo, though, which makes me optimistic for its launch. It's not going win any medals, especially for it's driving sections, but it should make for a good one night stand.
Awesome.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

The Greatest Composer You've Never Heard Of

Inon Zur is a man with an amazing name -- let's be upfront about that. But did you know that he's composed soundtracks for over 30 videogames, and good ones at that? With big names like Company of Heroes: Opposing Fronts (Relic Entertainment / THQ) and Crysis (Crytek/EA) under his belt, the composer's aforementioned amazing name carries with it a pedigree few others can match.

Well, good news for people who like good news: today, Bethesda Softworks announced their collaboration with Zur on their upcoming lunchbox collectible post-apocalyptic shooter, Fallout 3. Considering they've already worked together (admittedly on Pirates of the Caribbean: The Legend of Jack Sparrow) and the fact that Zur also worked on Fallout Tactics: Brotherhood of Steel (again, admittedly, a Fallout game few outside the fanboy circle will remember, though well reviewed), we can't imagine this being a poor match-up. In fact, based on the epic opening music for Crysis, we can't wait to hear the grandeur Inon Zur's composing talents will bring to the table.

Also, according to the Bethesda Softworks press release:

"Currently under development at Bethesda Game Studios – creators of award-winning The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion®, the 2006 Game of the Year – Fallout 3 is slated for release this Fall on Xbox 360®video game and entertainment system from Microsoft, PLAYSTATION®3 computer entertainment system, and Games for Windows."

Release window confirmed? Alright, we kind of already knew this vague information, but reading it once again, much closer to Fall 2008 than when we originally read it (in June of last year), helps to reassure the trepidatious gamer.

GTAIV Makes Boatloads of Cash

In case you were doubting that Grand Theft Auto IV was going to make crazy shit tons of money, the New York Times is reporting that a whopping six million copies of the game have been sold, with over half of those being sold on the first day. That is, apparently, over 500 million dollars, which is more than the net worth of both Olsen twins combined. Egads!

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

How Can You Have Any Pudding If You Don't Eat Your Meat!?

Hot off the presses people! Online interactive magazine? Who knew? Unfortunately not us. Created by the folks at gamerzines.com, it's a great interactive .pdf file of the upcoming 360 slasher/gorefest that is Ninja Gaiden II. Includes videos pictures and other interactive elements showcasing the game. Plus if you go to their website you can subscribe for free to a variety of their different console magazines (They also produce content for DS, PS3, Wii, PSP, etc).




So what's the catch? Well it's pretty much all sunshine and rainbows. I read through the Ninja Gaiden II issue, and although it was the only issue I've ever read, I didn't see a single criticism of the game. But what the hell it's an easy way to get first looks at screens and gameplay videos sent directly to your inbox. What are you waiting for? 'Cause when you're a gamer, you know what happens when you stand still... (Wait... I know this one... hold.. on...)

Rock Band DLC Coming to PS2/Wii

The folks at Harmonix, MTV and EA collectively announced their plans to make a 20-track disc of (seemingly random) downloadable songs collected from the 360/PS3 versions of Rock Band for the PS2 and Wii today, aptly titled Rock Band Track Pack Volume 1. According to their press release, the disc, "features an electrifying mix of classic hits and current favorites, including songs by Boston, Nine Inch Nails, Stone Temple Pilots, and All American Rejects." Oooh, All American Rejects! Ok, maybe not. The price point is fair if not very reasonable at $29.99 for this smattering of rock and roll hits, though certain selections seem a bit...unclear. The finalized track list follows:

30 Seconds to Mars, "The Kill" <-----Yeah, what?
All American Rejects, "Move Along"
Blink – 182, "All the Small Things"
Boston, "More Than a Feeling"
David Bowie, "Moonage Daydream"
Faith No More, "We Care A Lot"
Grateful Dead, "Truckin’"
The Hives, "Die, All Right!"
KISS, "Calling Dr. Love"
Lynyrd Skynyrd, "Gimme’ Three Steps"
Nine Inch Nails, "March of the Pigs" <-----Woot!
Oasis, "Live Forever"
Paramore, "Crushcrushcrush"
The Police, "Synchronicity II"
Queens of the Stone Age, "Little Sister" <-----Woot!
The Ramones, "Teenage Lobotomy" <-----Woot!
Smashing Pumpkins, "Siva" <-----Woot!
Stone Temple Pilots, "Interstate Love Song"
Weezer, "Buddy Holly" <-----Woot!
Wolfmother, "Joker & the Thief"

So for those suffering from the Wii's lack of a hard drive for downloadable content and those holding fast hope for the big PS2 revival (any day now!), this disc of dlc will act as your vicarious use of the internet through modern videogame consoles. Oh, and it'll be released for PS2/Wii on Tuesday, July 15th. But wouldn't you really be better served saving that money towards a 360 or PS3? Just sayin' is all.

Monday, May 5, 2008

[Early Impressions] All Apologies

Apologies to everyone from us here at QP. We haven't gotten a review up of GTA IV. We're still waiting on that for one very good reason: we can't put it down! It's like that episode of Doug where he wins a "Super-Pretendo" and and stays up all weekend playing "Space Munks" only to realize he hasn't even started his paper for class.

So to make up for the lack of review I'll tell you what has impressed me the most so far. GTA IV has done one thing I haven't seen in a video game so far, and that is using the physics engine to drive some of the cinematics. Key word here being 'some.' Specifically, on one of the first Playboy X missions, you have to snipe some guys watching guard off of construction equipment. Each time you shoot them the game goes to a cut scene, showing the enemy falling to the ground. The first time one guy simply smashed face first into the ground. On the second play the same enemy fell in a totally different way and a shot discharged from his weapon. The little things people! It's incredible how much Rockstar thought about when making this game.

Casual Monday -- You Have to Shave the Beard Edition

Sometimes, you just have to make that giant recreation of your favorite 2D side-scroller's character costumes and then do battle. Let's be clear -- it's the right thing to do. (Is he fighting Gohan?) Either way, this week's casual release comes to us as a confusing menagerie of meta-game/actual-game/flash-game/beard-game, in the form of Castle Crashing The Beard -- a mini-game created for the Behemoth programmer (and newgrounds.com creator) Tom Fulp. Simply put, CCTB is centered around one man's quest to not shave until his work is done and one castle crasher's fight against that.

According to the horse's mouth directly, "Tom Fulp, creator of Newgrounds.com and programmer for “The Behemoth” has vowed not to shave his face until the release of his next console game, Castle Crashers for the X-Box 360 live-arcade. Newgrounds office workers have noticed Tom’s behavior and sanity steadily declining as his beard grows.
Will Tom win his battle to finish Castle Crashers, or will “The Beard” win in the end?"

So you've seen it here first! You can now say with confidence you've played a really good meta-game/actual-game/flash-game/beard-game. Hey, at very least it was entertaining, right? See y'all in the cut.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Week-End Podcast Roundup -- GTA4 (and Not Much More) Edition

Yes, yes, we're playing it. We heart it too. A review is coming -- it's long! And you know this. That doesn't mean nothing else is goin' on! Noted by Joystiq's Justin McElroy in this week's Joystiq Podcast (the same podcast that held up production of this very podcast roundup, thank you very much), output in the games journalism field this entire week has taken a significant downturn, with every single podcast weighing in notoriously lighter than usual (including their own.)

GiantBomb pulls an all-nighter and Jeff Gerstmann is nearly zombified, 1UP Yours gets philosophical (shocking!), Cheapy and Wombat talk about poop (less shocking) and GFW Radio has disappeared (let's hope not permanently.) All this and more, [tips hat] as your weekend is (nearly?) confirmed.

The GiantBombcast (feat. Jeff Gerstmann and Ryan Davis)
Joystiq Podcast (feat. Chris Grant, Ludwig Kietzmann and Justic McElroy)
The CAGcast
(feat Cheapy D and Wombat)
The 1UP Show and 1UP Yours Podcast (feat. Garnett Lee, Shane Bettenhausen, Nick Suttner and Shawn Elliott)

And finally, Quarterplay would like to give a shoutout to everyone at the Cottman Avenue GameStop in Northeast Philadelphia for handling such a massive turnout with relative ease and professionalism, as well as the free pizza (thanks Papa John's, you pseudo-pizzeria, you.) Though I, (me, personally, Benjamin Gilbert), do not necessarily agree with many practices of the GameStop corporation on the whole, individual branches are often full of nice individuals who play games actively and are (usually) friendly -- this specific location especially. Don't hate the player, hate the game, right? Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to return to Liberty City...

Thursday, May 1, 2008

IGN Hate Boat Going Full Sail

To keep with my personal vested interested in yesterday's news regarding Surfer Girl Reviews Star Wars and IGN, I'm once again using Quarterplay to show our readers exactly what I'm talking about when I make a statement as straight up as, "No more IGN."

The video, linked above, was pulled from IGN.com (presumably) following the pounding of many angry fists. Leigh Alexander puts it concisely in her opening paragraphs:

"Regardless of what I think of their work, I try not to criticize other outlets, insult other journalists or anything tacky like that. After all, we're all on the same side here, everyone's fallible and I certainly don't claim to be Captain Queen Awesome or anything, to say the least.

But when IGN does something like this, I can't help it. What the fuck were you guys thinking? Do you really think so little of your audience? Worse, do you really think so little of the industry?"

I agree wholeheartedly. It's really hard to break form and openly "talk shit" or disparage other outlets, especially considering the original video was pulled and I'm not even sure who personally I'm disparaging, but when it's necessary, it's necessary. What do you readers think? I know it isn't everyone who looks at videogames as art (and in most cases, I myself do not) but I would like to think videogame enthusiast outlets (ourselves included) could do readers in general a favor and not assume they're the morons screaming racial slurs on Xbox Live or frothing at the mouth masses, anxiously awaiting more T&A (though I'm not above admitting more T&A isn't always out of place -- natch.) More on this as it, undoubtedly, unfolds.

New Street Fighter 4 Screens Released, Maniacal Laughing Confirmed

Cruising through these giant, interconnected tubes this morning, we found ourselves face to face with the big boss himself -- M. Bison. Unsurprisingly, he was standing in a corner, arms folded across his chest, laughing in our collective face. That was before he started conjuring energy attacks with his bare hands. Terrifying, we know. Lucky for you, we captured some shots of the boss man, as well as some of his buddies, who will round out the SF4 cast upon the game's "To Be Announced" release date. First up, the man with the big red cap:



Look at those dead, lifeless eyes! He's like a big teddybear! And the way that matter bends around his presence, enough to give a girl the vapors!



Next up is everyones favorite backscratch post, Vega. We know you've got a mask on sir, but could you please give us something? Maybe a bit of blood or dirt to show you've been fighting? How about a big band-aid under your eye like Nelly? We kid!



And finally we present you with a leaping shot of Sagat (aka, the man with the cheap fireballs) who is, fittingly, hanging out on a pirate ship. ::insert obvious eyepatch joke here:: We'll keep the shots coming if we run into any more of these guys. Oh, and Capcom, how about some real information next time?

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Journalistic Integrity? What's That?

We're not exactly known for our hard hitting investigative reporting and industry-wide criticisms here at Quarterplay (though it is known to happen), but as a major of journalism and a believer in journalistic integrity, it would be flat out impossible for me, personally, to not post something regarding the recent "McIGN" statements made by everyone's favorite videogame rumor blog, Surfer Girls Reviews Star Wars.

He/she tears apart recent posts by IGN Nintendo Associate Editor Daemon Hatfield as well as IGN Nintendo editor in chief Matt Casamassina, citing misinformation and editorial mixing with advertising. I'm not one to take many stances, especially regarding my career and it's future, but as I've been saying in person to friends for the past few years, IGN is a terrible website. The fact that it's Fox-owned doesn't help, but it's terrible writing combined with it's "fuck everyone else" attitude, as a human being, pushes me elsewhere. Remember IGN's Hilary Goldstein taking potshots at CheapyD (of CheapAssGamer fame) on his podcast? I sure do, and I'm willing to bet CheapyD does as well.

The gaming community has little space for tough guy jerks and elitist mentality. Personally, I listen to about eight or nine gaming podcasts a week and not a single one is from IGN. I tried -- they're not funny and they're smattered with arrogance. So let me be the first, speaking for myself and not for Quarterplay on the whole, to say this: No more IGN. In the immortal words of Hans Moleman, "Let's not listen."


PS: The picture at the top is for real, and thus, "McIGN." GameSpot is notorious for skinning their site in ads as well (remember the Kane & Lynch fiasco?), so we're not sayin' anything about this. Hell, if you want to skin Quarterplay in Target ads and pay off my college loan, go for it. It does look ridiculous though, let's be honest.

Assault Heroes 2 Gets Dated, Detailed

Hot off the steamy, giant, interconnected tubes comes news today that a sequel to everyone's favorite Smash TV ripoff is coming to Xbox Live Arcade on May 14th. You guessed it (clearly with help from the picture to your left) -- Assault Heroes 2 has been slated for the aforementioned mid-May release, bringing with it, "hi-jackable enemy vehicles, more levels and enhanced on-foot and co-operative gameplay modes."

We suppose that the whole vehicles thing helps separate this from it's many top-down shooter brethren, though it's thinly veiled yet takes-itself-too-seriously story didn't help differentiate it the first time around. IGN had a lovefest with the first one, though they did agree that it's story was as silly as the fact that they tried implementing a story into an XBLA game. If you, like us, spent nine straight hours playing Ikari Warriors when you were a child just to see it's stupid, stupid ending, then you may have burnt out on these (completely infuriating) kind of games a little while ago. For the rest of you, Assault Heroes 2 comes out in two weeks. At the very worst it's a possible 200 Nerd Points, but who're we kidding, you'll be playing GTA4 with us online, right?

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Microsoft (Barely) Details GTA4 Exclusive DLC Release Date


Continuing the deluge of Grand Theft Auto 4 information, a press release from Microsoft today notes, "Starting this autumn, Xbox 360 owners will also have access to exclusive Grand Theft Auto IV episodes that will provide hours of additional game play." This autumn being officially September 21st through December 20th, we're going all the way crazy and saying this date's just a bit hazy in it's specifics. Considering I'm roughly five percent through the main story and have owned it for five hours or so, they can take all the time they need -- for now. Us here at QP will of course keep you updated as more details unfold.

Launch of the Year? GTA4 Midnight Release, Philly Style

As people waking up for class/work in the next five or six hours, it'd be hard to say we're glad that Grand Theft Auto 4 inspired GameStop (among other retailers) to hold midnight release events wherein you arrive late at night, buy your copy of the game ('Would you like a strategy guide with that? 20% off if you buy it with the game!') and then proceed to go home and play it well past any reasonable hour (it's currently 3:30 in the morning.) That last part, we suppose, is optional, though hardly controllable. We arrived at the local area GameStop around 11:40, debit card in hand, and $64.19 later, we were lining up to wait out the rest of the hour with everyone else. The line, as you can sort of see, was extensive, though not disabling so. As detailed in our previous midnight release coverage, this particular GameStop location handles events such as these with relative ease -- politely ushering everyone in and out, keeping people informed and generally making the situation a pleasant one.



In the intermediary, we took time to speak with the lucky group of fellas heading up the (by midnight) 200+ person raving beast we dare call a "line." Anthony, Joe and Rob like Grand Theft Auto quite a bit -- not necessarily first-in-line-at-a-Star-Wars-opening level excitement, but excited enough that they arrived three hours ahead of time. (We should mention, though located within Philadelphia city limits, this particular GameStop location isn't exactly in an exciting neighborhood, so three hours here means something.) Anthony was the glorified gamer among the group, having played and completed nearly all GTA's, excluding only Vice City Stories for the PSP and having started with number two on the Playstation 1. GTA3 was the majority favorite among these guys, who were all prepared to go home and start immediately.



Upon exiting the glowing light of GameStop's front windows and seeing the line for what it had truly become, we snapped another shot to our best ability (which is to say very little), and QP blogger extraordinaire Shawn Annable noted, "There have to be at least 200 people here. This is nuts." Within minutes the clock had struck midnight and the line began moving -- fast.



As you can clearly see, we certainly didn't leave empty handed. A quick trip to the nearby Wendy's to insure gastrointestinal problems later in the night sealed our adventure with a greasy and over-processed kiss. In case you were wondering, the mysterious markings on my receipt are just a few of the Ancient Druid rune writings, passed down centuries upon centuries through dynasty to dynasty of GameStop Regional Managers. It's beauty knows no bounds.



It's currently 4:30 in the a.m. when I type these last words, half wired on coffee/half asleep from exhaustion. We're glad GTA4 came out on a Monday, seriously.

Uwe Bolls Wants to Beat Your $#%, Michael Bay



It would be straight up unfair to not mention this to you fine folks. Known for directing such classy films as Alone in the Dark and House of the Dead, Uwe Boll has made a name for himself by inspiring hate as a byproduct of his work (especially from gamers.) His latest film, Postal, based on the terrible game of the same name has him back in the news, this time challenging Michael Bay (yes, that Michael Bay) to a boxing match after Bay had the gall to say he didn't care about Mr. Salad, er, Mr. Boll. This kind of thing wouldn't even normally be tied to his terrible productions, but this time his public statement of idiocy is meant to inspire folks who were out there fence sitting about seeing it. So in other words, this is targeted at nobody. It is, however, hilarious. Good luck removing Uwe-isms from your daily conversations!

Monday, April 28, 2008

Casual Monday -- Back On the Horse Edition

Another week, another bloody fight to the death, er, free casual game, just for you! This week we bring you a throwback to the future with Noitu Love & the Army of Grinning Darns, a title straight outta konjak.org that's spilling over the top with 16/32-bit era goodness. It's kind of like MegaMan, it's kind of like Castlevania and it's 100% free to download (unlike it's sequely brother, most recently featured on the 1UP Show.)

The game is an interesting twist on a classic platformer setup in that it changes how you interact with the enemies -- more specifically, this game is a combination of Final Fight/Double Dragon and MegaMan. You are guiding your character with the typical 'wasd' setup and attacking enemies with the click of your mouse. (Nearly) more important than any of this: Noitu Love was made by a single man. Dude did the music, art, programming, testing...everything. You may want to check out the game based on this impressive caveat alone. And with that, we'll leave you to your murdering, you murderer.